Blakey Locks The Degenerate Gambling Intern: College Football Week Eleven

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Hello, friends. *extremely Jim Nance voice* I am Blakey Locks, the Degenerate Gambling Intern, and I will be your guide this fall. Every weekend I am going to traverse you through the trials and tribulations of betting your mortgage on a weekend of football. From the New England Patriots to the Northern Arizona Lumberjacks, I will give you the knowledge necessary to conquer your bookie and feed your children. We will win together, lose together and laugh together. Let’s ride.

College Football Week 11

The clock is ticking on one has been an unreal season of college football. We’ve laughed, we’ve cried, we’ve made money, and most of all we’ve lost money. On some real shit though last weekend was the best gambling Saturday of my entire life. I couldn’t stop making bets for the weekend and I was crazy nervous. I had literally 34 plays. In addition to that, I was preparing to bet a lot of Breeders Cup action. To say the day was a success would be an understatement, I started the day 12-0!!! NOT A TYPO! 12-0! I hit a 2/1 winner and a trifecta in back to back races and I was up a months rent before I even knew what was happening. I rode out the rest of the day around .500 and I was up 15 units in college football plus going up a couple hundred dollars on the ponies. Pretty good Locks man, pretty good.
Let’s duplicate that shit.

Degenerate of the Week


To nominate yourself or a friend for Degen of the Week, Tweet or DM submissions to me @BlakeKrass on Twitter.
SVP is the king of Degenerate Nation. There might be BIGGER degenerates, but no one has done more work to bring sports betting into the spotlight than SVP. The fact that he started doing Bad Beats on his SportsCenter hour is in the gambling hall of fame. To this day, SVP is willing to defend the wall against gambling haters on the TL. When Cynthia from Iowa tweets @ SVP “my son was watching your SportsCenter and then you started talking about GAMBLING! We went right to church and haven’t left in three weeks. Please never do this again.” Then SVP basically tells her she’s a big dumb idiot but does it in a way more eloquent way than I ever could. So this person came into SVP’s mentions and hated on him for having a couple losing picks so SVP asked him what his action was the rest of the afternoon. He promptly went 0-2 including betting Penn State which might have been the worst bet of the entire weekend. What a hack. SVP promptly bodybags him and that is that. TYFYS Scott. Penis Man Forever.

Girlfriend Game of the Week

My girlfriend watches almost no football. She knows nothing about any teams. Luckily gambling is all about raw instinct. It’s a gamble after all. Every week I am going to ask her out of the blue who is going to win a certain game. There’s a good chance these picks win at a higher percentage than mine. (2-1)
We took a loss last weekend after a 2-0 start BUT picking Virginia Tech as a suicide pick could technically be a pick for Boston College so… it’s complicated. If you don’t know what I’m talking about go look at last week’s guide. This week we’re looking at Texas -1.5 against Texas Tech.

It is decided.

Marquee Matchups


The fun is over. It’s time to get down to business. You naturally want to bet the games you’re going to watch. So, I have the “Mountains are Blue Ice Cold Locks” for the featured games of the weekend right here.

Clemson @ Boston College (+20) o/u 56.5


Fuckkkk Clemson. People forget that Clemson never disavowed the pipe bomber, making them complicit in his attempted acts of terror.


This basically puts the Upstate University in the same conversation as State Penn and State Ohio in my book. They have been added to the Blakey Locks disavowed list. That makes three teams on the list. Be on the lookout if you have skeletons in your closet. I gave Clemson ample time to respond and heard nothing. Boston College, on the other hand, is planning to host the biggest game at BC since Matt Ryan left and topple Clemson’s playoff dreams. Frankly, I think they have a shot. My favorite play? First half. BC will come out hot and fiery and hit Upstate U in the mouth. Upstate will probably come back and win the game due to their grinding rushing attack but I like BC to keep it close for a while.
Upstate U OFFICIAL Disavowment Lock of the Season: Boston College +10.5 1H

Auburn @ Georgia (-14) o/u 52


The Deep South’s Oldest Rivalry. A rich history of epic matchups. Unfortunately, this year will not be one of them. The Dawgs finally turned the corner and became the team we knew they could be against Florida and then sealed their destiny by dominating Kentucky. Georgia is going to ROLL against Auburn this year. This team honestly kinda stinks. They’re gonna get steamrolled by UGA and Alabama two of the next three weeks. I do not envy them. The Dawgs are starting to look like the team that *almost* beat Bama last year. I’m thinking they’ll be that team again this year. The Dawgs want to keep the momentum going into that game so I don’t see them taking it easy here (and if they do their backup QB is better than the starter sooo).
https://twitter.com/BarstoolGT/status/979834242430570497
For those who have never seen it before, this is a snap sent by Georgia QB Jake Fromm last season. Maybe a win against Auburn will help him get one step closer to his goal.
Please Help Jake Fromm Cum Lock of the Century: Georgia -14

Mississippi State @ Alabama (-24) o/u 52.5


Side Note: I think my favorite part of my job is just watching different CFB hype videos on Twitter. These guys could make the Hellen Keller School for the Deaf & Blind look like favorites against Bama by just showing uniforms in cool lighting with rap beats in the background. It also makes my job as a gambler much harder because whichever team’s video I come across first looks like the right bet to me. In this case, it’s the Cowbells. My number one rule of CFB gambling is “You Won’t Get Rich Betting Against Alabama.” Well this week, I am going to break my only rule. I know Saban doesn’t let down, HOWEVA, if there was ever a time to let down it would be coming off of that win against LSU. Having to face a low key ELITE defense in Miss State after facing that physical LSU defense could make Alabama look human. Now I don’t think Cowbells have a shot, but I think they are actually one of the better matchups in the SEC against Bama because of their defense and Nick Fitz. Hail State.
You Won’t Get Rich Betting Against Alabama But I’m Doing It Anyways And Also My Boss Hates Alabama and I Want To Support The Company Bet of the Decade: Mississippi State +24

Ohio State @ Michigan State (+3.5) o/u 50


The Blakey Locks Disavoment Tour continues. This time it’s Urban Liar and State Ohio on the hitlist. For those that are unfamiliar with the list here it is:

To add fuel to the fire, my girlfriend’s brother plays football for Michigan State and he is a LARGE man. I don’t know if he would ever read this but if he did I would want to make sure he knows how much I respect him and his sister, sir. Those two factors are huge in my decision process. Another key piece is it’s in East Lansing and it’s supposed to be in the 30s with a below freezing wind chill. Games like that just scream Michigan State to me. There’s something about Mark Dantonio with his red face all wrapped up and a little frost on the Sparty logo in the middle of the field that makes me think Michigan State is gonna win. Also, State Ohio has played like dogshit since their loss to Purdue. They almost blew it last week against an awful Nebraska team. All the signs are pointing to Sparty for me on this one (besides the fact that State Ohio is better at football).
My Girlfriend’s Brother Who Plays For Michigan State Could Definitely Kick My Ass Lock of the 2000’s: Michigan State +3.5

The Slate

This guide is meant to be fun, but if you came here for picks I will indulge you. Here are the locks of the week outside the Marquee Matchups.
THE BIGGEST THING IN AMERICA PEOPLE ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT RIGHT NOW: this “comedy” guide is dominating bookmakers worldwide. Last week between all picks we went 12-3 including Baylor ML +235. That pays off this month’s rent, next month’s rent, and covers your losses when I inevitably lose this weekend. Let’s roll.
Tennessee +5.5 vs. Kentucky
Miami +3 @ Georgia Tech
Oregon +4 @ Utah
FSU +17 @ ND, u50.5
Virginia Tech +3 @ Pitt
TCU +11.5 @ WVU
Vaderbilt vs. Missouri u62
Let’s have the weekend of our lives folks. As always you can Tweet me @BlakeKrass and complain or praise me about my picks and follow along on the average degenerate Saturday. If you want a more comprehensive break down of some of these games or just want to support ya boy then go ahead and download this episode of my podcast, Longshot Locks, and subscribe to get all future episodes right on your cellular phone. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/longshot-locks/id1440550176?mt=2
And as always, let’s get rich, together.

Miami Hurricanes Fan Sets Florida Gators Fan's Window Flag On Fire
Miami Hurricanes Fan Sets Florida Gators Fan's Window Flag On Fire
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