Florida Woman Arrested For Drinking White Claw & Driving, Says ‘They Are Only 5% ‘

Florida Woman arrested drinking White Claws while driving / via Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office

Florida Woman Denae Morrison must’ve thought there were no laws against driving with a Claw because she was drinking a Claw and driving, according to the cops from the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office who arrested her for DUI. Denae wouldn’t take a Breathalyzer and admitted to having two Claws while driving, but added “They are only 5% alcohol.”

From WFTS:

Denae Morrison, 32, was pulled over by a Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office deputy after a witness called 911 stating that she was swerving out of her lane while drinking a White Claw on Wednesday.

After pulling Morrison over, the deputy noticed she “had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage on her breath;” and that “her hair was in a nest, her skirt was sideways and her shoes were off.”

I’m telling you guys, make fun of the Claws all you want, but those things will sneak up on you fast. They go down so fast that one minute you’re making logical decisions and the next you’re cruising down the road sippin on Claws and looking like a train wreck i.e. Denae.

The police report really needs to add what flavor she was drinking. I predict it was mango. These white women are out here slamming mango Claws like they’re about to stop selling that shitt. Ladies, they’re going to build some massive distribution center in New Jersey or something like that to keep up with your asses. The Claw shortage thing was a genius marketing play.

I was hoping to go over to Denae’s Facebook and see some Ain’t No Claws memes, but it wasn’t my lucky day:

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