Pornhub Gives Philly Police A Solution To Keeping Eagles Fans From Climbing Poles Sunday

Good morning from Philly where crews from the city are greasing the light poles with Crisco to prevent #Eagles fans from climbing after the #NFCChampionshipGame tonight. #Vikings pregame coverage starts at 3 on FOX9. They call themselves the #CriscoCops

— FOX 9 Sports (@Fox9Sports) January 21, 2018

All the talk out of Philly this week outside of the game itself is how the city plans on stopping Eagles fans from their path of destruction that is inevitably coming this weekend. Win or lose, it’s going to be mayhem in the streets on Sunday night. They win and it’s a joyous celebration of the first Super Bowl win in Eagles history that leaves the city in ruins. They lose and it’s army of angry Eagles looking to destroy anything and everything in their path, leaving the city in ruins. One way or another it’s happening.

So Philly police have been scheming and strategizing all week on how they plan to contain this. The Crisco’d┬áthe poles for the NFC Championship and that didn’t stop fans from scaling them with ease. This time around they apparently have a secret weapon, something much slicker┬áthan Crisco, to keep these animals off the poles.

But in case that doesn’t work, we have a third alternative courtesy of our friends at PornHub. Someone has a problem? PornHub has the solution. Yesterday, they heard about the City of Philadelphia’s little issue and offered to help. A little lube might do the trick.

.@PhillyPolice heard that you may be looking for an alternative to @Crisco for greasing up the poles this weekend – can we interest you in a few barrels of Pornhub lube?

— Pornhub ARIA (@Pornhub) January 31, 2018

— Philadelphia Police (@PhillyPolice) January 31, 2018

It can’t hurt to try. I’m willing to be it works like a charm. Pornhub continues to be the gift that keeps on giving

Let us not forget how badly the Crisco got dominated…the lube might actually work

Eagles fan 1 Crisco 0 (timfreakinlaskey/IG)

— Busted Coverage (@bustedcoverage) January 22, 2018

CRISCO CAN'T STOP THESE FANS!#Philadelphia city workers greased up poles in hopes of stopping fans from climbing them after the #MINvsPHI game.#Eagles fans were up to the challenge. #FlyEaglesFly (per @JessiThorne)

— Chris Stewart (@CStewartTheNow) January 22, 2018