Ohio County Heath Commissioner: Stop The Birthday Parades

Montgomery County, Ohio health commissioner Jeff Cooper said to stop birthday parades / via WHIO

The fun police in Dayton, Ohio have come for the birthday car parades that kids, and people of all ages, have been enjoying during coronavirus and Montgomery County health commissioner Jeff Cooper wants those parades to stop right now. These people participating are violating the Ohio stay-at-home order, according to Jeff. Imagine being Jeff and sitting there justifying his job by going after birthday car parades.

Hey Jeff, WHERE ARE THE FUCCING TESTS? Get some tests going so I can visit my parents one of these days. No matter what your birdbrain thinks about birthday car parades it’s not going to stop them so take that birdbrain energy and go find some tests.

Here’s what Jeff Cooper said Thursday:

STOP THE PARADES: Such events that feature a line of vehicles filing past a child celebrating a birthday, for example, need to remain in line with the governor’s stay-at-home order, which states (among other things) that people should leave home only for essential activities. County Health Commissioner Jeff Cooper said “parades do not meet the intention of the order. They need to be discontinued. It’s not fun to say, but that’s the reality of where we are right now.”

Hey Jeff, look here at the Kettering (OH) police department in your county just trying to spread a little bit of joy during coronavirus. Keep being a bitch, Jeff.

Hey Jeff, you really don’t want this little girl to have a birthday car parade? Shame on you Jeff. Go find coronavirus tests and stop trying to be a cop who sits on the outskirts of town where the speed limit drops to 25 mph waiting to fucc people:

Hey Jeff, what’s wrong with this Sweet 16 parade in your city/county? Would you rather the whole extended family be in one of these 1200 sq. ft. houses coughing on each other? Stop being a bitch, Jeff.

Yeah, I’d hate to see things like this happen in the world. Just an old timer celebrating his 90th birthday — not in Dayton — with a car parade.

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