Blakey Locks Becomes An Arianator: Day One

What a day, folks, what a day. Last night I chronicled my plan to become an Arianator. For those that don’t know, an Arianator is one who has committed their life to be an Ariana Grande fan and defending her on the internet. Other parts of the job entail bodying Selena Gomez fans and Pete Davidson and telling Ariana how much you love her every time she tweets. So far it has been a wild ride. I can roll out the timeline for you here:
12:01 EST


I made my official announcement with my blog from last night and I changed my Twitter name to Blakey Arianator. This was the start of my new chapter in which I decided to pursue my true calling as an Internetsman.
12:05 PM


This was my first Ariantor follow train. There are THOUSANDS of Ariana Grande follow trains every day. Accounts that tweet out something similar to the tweet above and all Arianators can RT and follow each other to build the strongest community on the World Wide Web.
1:11 PM


I learned a new piece of Internet lingo. “ifb”- I follow back. It’s important to comment this on follow trains so that the other Ari stans know that you aren’t just trying to steal follows, you genuinely want to build this community.
(This tweet got 70 likes and counting not to brag).
1:24 PM


I body bagged my first Ari hater. What a thrill it was.
1:26 PM


I was clearly still riding my high from fucking up Johnny Mayo and was ready to add Kanye to the kill list.
1:41 PM


I ANNIHILATED this sexist chauvinistic bag of milk. It also taught me the best thing about being an Arianator, being able to use the title of her song “Thank u, next” as a response to everything. It kills. Definitely testing it out next time I get a text from my bookie.
1:51 PM


I get my first shoutout from a big-time Ariana fan account. This gal has 10.1K followers and hit me with the must follow already. Word of my good works must be spreading throughout the Ariantor community at a blistering pace.
2:31 PM


Ariana tweeted for the first time all day. To be honest I have no fucking clue what that quote means but even on my first day I learned that you should tell Ari you love her under every one of her tweets. I’m serious. Her tweets get 1,000 replies in the first minute they go up and they all just say “I love you” or “spill that tea” or “we stan.” It is truly incredible.
3:43 PM


Shoved this bozo in a locker for daring to come at the Queen. Thank u, next.
1:59-2:00


Ari is starting to tease song lyrics from her album and people are going BANANAS.
Overall my first day as an Arianator has been incredible. I have gained 120 followers and counting just today, I have defended the crown, I have gained some respect in the Ari community, and above all, I have made friends for life. In my initial blog, I wrote that I “wanted to be a part of something bigger than myself.” I have already found that with the Arianators. I can’t wait to see where things go from here.
Peace. Love. Ari.

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