Stephen F. Austin Head Coach Basically Blames Their Tournament Loss On The Fact That His Players Are Millennials

I love a good “old man yells at a cloud” story and this one is right up their with the all-timers. When in doubt about anything, you can always just blame the millennials and everything will end up fine and dandy. Why do you think there’s a new article every week about something the millennials ruined?

Yesterday, Stephen F. Austin, a 14 -seed, came close to pulling off a huge upset against 3-seeded Texas Tech in the East. They only lost by 10 and it was really closer than that. It was a valiant effort and even though they aren’t moving on, you’d think SFA’s coach would be proud of his squad for hanging close.

Instead, he blamed these damn millennials and their phones and their Instachats.

Washington Post:

Apparently, you can add Stephen F. Austin Team 2017-18 to the long list of things that millennials have ruined.

The 14th-seeded Lumberjacks’ upset bid of third-seeded Texas Tech fell apart in the second half of a 70-60 NCAA tournament loss Thursday in Dallas. They led by eight early in the second half and held that lead until four minutes remained, when the wheels fell off. Stephen F. Austin would score two more points the rest of the game.

Coach Kyle Keller was understandably upset at this turn of events, and he blamed millennials. His team of college students is lousy with them, apparently.

“The millennials today, they don’t even watch college basketball,’’ he said after the game, per USA Today. “A lot of our guys didn’t even know who those cats [Texas Tech players] were because they don’t watch the game. They’re on their phone and doing that kind of stuff.

“I hate to say it, but as much as you or I or anybody in here watches the games, they don’t. Or the NBA. They might watch the slam-dunk contest in February on TNT or whatever, but that’s about the extent of it.”

Anytime you can blame your players in the media for being born in an era where technology is everything and dictates our day-to-day life, you have to do it. They just don’t watch the game anymore because they’re too busy playing on Snapface.

No word on if Keller knows that you can, in fact, watch sports on your phone.

He went on to tell a story about green beans that is straight out of the old guy playbook.

“If I don’t read it and study it and learn and try to figure these kids out, I have no chance to coach. … Because the way I was taught as a child was, ‘Hey, you are going to eat what is on your plate, if not, you’re going to sit here.’ I had to sit at the kitchen table one Saturday afternoon because I didn’t want to eat green beans or salmon patties.

“So we have a lot of green beans on our team meals, and I tell that story to our guys. But you have to adjust. You’d better learn to give and some take with these kids, I think.’’

Green beans are the key to these kids, apparently.

Also, just want out point out that I am a millennial and, if you can believe it, do enjoy watching the game of basketball.

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