Aaron Judge Chipped His Tooth Celebrating Walk-Off Win, Is In Fact Not A Robot


We learned something very important last night after Brett Gardner’s walk-off home run to beat the Rays: Aaron Judge is actually a human being and not a robot like we all assumed. All 6’7″, 280 pounds of muscle that bashes home runs into orbit is somehow a person just like you and me.

How do I know this? Well, he chipped his tooth. Robots don’t chip teeth.

This is what happens when you’re comedically tall. Nobody else is getting hit in the tooth by someone’s helmet because nobody in baseball is that goddamn tall.

I mean look at this.

Before Yankee fans lose their minds, he will be in the lineup today.

The Yankees actually went out and looked for his tooth after the game…It’ll probably be auctioned on Steiner Sports by this afternoon

Weekend editor based in Atlanta. Contact me: dan.crawford@teamcoed.com
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