Have enough money laying around to buy Mario Lemieux’ s French-Canadian chateau for $21,999,066? There’s a pretty good chance you’re not reading this because you don’t have time for blogs when you’re out there busy being rich. I mean, the first thing I’d do once I had that kind of money is to delete every single social media account I’ve ever opened and then smash my phone. New phone, new life. Probably go flip phone. Old school because I wouldn’t need social media apps.
Sure, I’d need apps to run the lights in this pad that has seven bedrooms that are bigger than your house, but I figure there’s an iPad that handles all that stuff.
Now for my impressions of this place: where do you go in this massive place to have fun? It looks like the type of place where you show up and try to figure out what not to touch so you don’t break something. Where do you play video games? Where do you and the boys drink a bunch of beers and start getting rowdy, maybe some indoor beer pong during the rough winters? And the pool area just seems boring. No TVs that I can see. I need to be able to catch the end of the U.S. Open?
From Mario’s French-Canadian realtor:
Inspired by Québec city Château Frontenac Presence of the Fleur de Lys emblem on the estate. The exterior is made with stones from Lake Champlain Every bedrooms with lake views. High end insulation value. Heated floors throughout the property, geothermal system with 5 wells. Spectacular stair tower Pine beams from Quebec. Every details, light fixtures, chandeliers, lighting, lanterns, ramps, staircases, etc, are custom made by Arte Mexico in LA. Oak wood floor 12 foot ceilings in most rooms + cathedral ceilings. Guest house with 2 bedrooms and a large deck. 4.5 dining areas 5 washers and dryers. 17 fireplaces. Antique columns imported from an 1800 Indian castle. Vichy shower hydro Jets. massage. Walk-in fridge. Bar and wine cellar. Refrigerated garbage room. Large ski and sports room. Gym Spa with adjoining bathroom, Vichy shower, steam shower. Elevator. Prep kitchen. Paddle tennis. Wet deck pool and spa. Outdoor shower. 4.5 garages. Loggia Pizza kitchen. The house is equipped with a diesel generator servicing the entire house. Bunkered Home theatre Internet controlled domo system.
Look, I get it, you buy this place to keep your wife happy. She gets to fly (private) friends up to Mont-Tremblant and have them nerd out on how great her life must be. But for guys, this place is an absolute nightmare. I need an indoor basketball court or something like that. Maybe a shooting range. Bowling alley? Where is the bowling alley?
Mortgage: doesn’t matter, you can’t pay the electric bill.