As if we expected anything less of Gronk. He brought Team Jizz Blaster back to his hometown of Buffalo and hit up Mickey Rats, a local beach bar. Mickey Rats is notorious for getting pretty raucous during the summer and when Gronk shows up things get taken to the next level. He was spraying whipped cream on himself. Signing beer-bongs. Talking about singing titties. Police raid. JUMP!
You know the routine. It's Thursday, Gronk & Team Jizz Blaster roll into another town with their Zubaz, thirsts & raging hormones. Only one thing stands between the Team & gash - an OK from the prey. So there was Meridith Pineapples (@LaPinaCoolada) yesterday at Foxwoods working as a Nantucket Nectar model. Next thing she knows, Gronk is making a gash move. JUMP!
Ho-hum, another weekend of Gronk & The Jizz Blasters in an exotic locale judging bikini contests, wearing his meathead YOLO sunglasses, shankin' his ass for fat black chicks, etc. Look, at this point the only force of nature that is going to stop this guy from jetting off to a club is training camp. That doesn't happen until like July 26. In the meantime, Team JB will gladly be hired by Wet Republic & Haze Nightclub to act like a meathead. JUMP!
What have we learned from Rob Gronkowski about life over the last 12 months? Fist pumping, grinding on blondes, wearing Zubaz, being Team Leader of the JB's and having chicks cup your balls for Instagrams can all pay off. The Patriots tight end signed a six-year deal today worth $54 million. That's a HUGE deal for a guy who "still wears jeans from high school," according to his father. Just think of the beach house he can afford for Spring Break '13. It's on, beotches! JUMP!