Would You Be a Virgin For 32 Years If It Meant You Could Marry Miss Universe?











It was obviously big news when Tim Tebow married former Miss Universe, Demi-Leigh Nel-Peters earlier this week. Tim Tebow has famously been open about his religion for his entire career and particularly, his virginity. Tim has made it clear over the years that he was saving himself for marriage. Now, some people don’t believe that a Heisman winning QB at an SEC school, first-round NFL draft pick, and TV star couldn’t possibly go without sex with all the women that must have thrown themselves at him.

But I believe Tim, I truly believe that he had the willpower to wait until his wedding night. Now that fateful night has finally arrived, and I pray that Tim has gotten it in no less than 45 times in the last couple of days. People have always clowned Tim Tebow for his religion and virginity, but the guy that gets to lose his virginity to Miss Universe truly gets the last laugh. I lost my virginity to my high school girlfriend, a lot of people lose their’s blackout drunk, or with some girl they never talk to again. So that raises the question, is it cooler to have sex for an extra 10-15 years of your life, or to get to have sex with Miss Universe for 50ish years (assuming they stay together and live happy healthy lives).

I honestly think this is a tough question. Your 20’s is supposed to be the time that you go crazy, make a bunch of mistakes, have sex with people you regret, drink too much, etc. etc. But what if instead, you use your 20’s to accomplish things career-wise that most people only dream of, make millions and millions of dollars, set yourself up with a gig for life, and then at 32 get to marry Miss Universe? I honestly think Tim is the winner here. I think 99% of guys if they’re being honest would trade spots with him in a heartbeat.

But where it gets interesting is: you don’t get to literally switch lives with Tim Tebow, you don’t get to become a millionaire athlete/TV star. You live your life exactly how your 20’s did (or will) play out but without any of the sex you had at the time, and then at 32, you get to marry Miss Universe. And let’s assume she legitimately loves you and wants to be with you forever and have kids with you and have lots of sex. That does get a little tougher. Because of course that means your life from 32 and on is pretty awesome, but you probably can’t have any real girlfriends or obviously have any sex until you’re 32. Quite the conundrum.

I am personally passing on Miss Universe and taking my life as is. If you’re not rich and famous, no girl will actually date you if you don’t have sex. That means you won’t get to have any of the companionships of a girlfriend throughout your 20’s. It also means you’ll be left out of all the locker room talk with the fellas that comes with having sex. And most importantly, you don’t get to actually have sex. The first, I don’t know, 100 times or so you have sex with Miss Universe is probably the greatest thing in the world, but if she’s your wife, inevitably the awesomeness of her being Miss Universe will wear off. I’d rather get to enjoy college and my 20’s. If you combine every sexual experience I’ll ever have it’s probably better than having sex with Miss Universe. Probably… right? In conclusion, in a direct life swap I would switch spots with Tim Tebow, but if I had to live my life as a virgin until 32 to marry Miss Universe, I’m sticking with my shitty life.

Let me know @BlakeyLocks on Twitter what side of the debate you’re on!

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