Imagine being Justin Foster and being so triggered by your ex-girlfriend’s new boyfriend that you’d spend money on a plane ticket to fly from Atlanta to Chicago to cut off the rival boyfriend’s penis. That’s committment to the triggered game. This is one of the wildest Florida Man stories I’ve ever seen and I’ve seen a few dozens stories in my day.
Justin Foster, 28, of Tallahassee allegedly flew from Atlanta to Chicago in March, rented a car to drive to the suburb of Des Plaines and attacked his ex-girlfriend’s boyfriend. Officials say Foster approached the man on the street, hit him in the head with a tire iron, carved his initials into the man’s leg, and then cut off his penis, tossing the organ over the fence.
Foster then dragged the bleeding man behind a parked car to hide him, according to prosecutors.. He later returned to the airport to fly back to Atlanta.
The new boyfriend was left with permanent brain damage and Foster is now up for attempted murder charges.
Look, I’ve been over this many times here at BC. Guys, she’s not worth it. Even if she is worth it, you’re going to jail for a long time where you will have to fight guys to watch Florida State games, you’ll be eating horrible food and you’ll waste so many years of your life over a woman who was going to make your life a living hell if you stuck together.
The best thing to do in these situations is to tell her to GTFO of your life so you can start pounding the bar scene for a solid 3-4 years and just go wild. Eventually you’ll find a girlfriend to settle down with once your metabolism drops at 35. Then you’ll be all relaxed and want to sit on the couch 6 out of 7 nights of the week. She’ll be ready to just be a fun hang out at home mom, maybe play some video games, watch movies and grab some nice food here and there.
You guys can’t go thinking cutting off a rival’s dong is the way to go. It’s just going to cost you a bunch of years in jail as Justin is about to learn.