Some Idiot Spray Painted Wayne Gretzky Statues In His Hometown


Welcome back, hockey.

Why would someone spray paint statues of Wayne Gretzky in his hometown of Brantford, Ontario? That’s what police are trying to figure out today, according to the Associated Press. Authorities say they have video of the vandalism so expect some idiots to pay dearly for this disgraceful act.

Brantford Mayor Chris Friel calls the vandalism “disgraceful” and a “crime against the community.”

Let me profile the criminal for the police: 16-26, white male, meathead, uses ‘bro’ instead of sir, crushes beers, crushes broads, wears his hat backwards and doesn’t have a father who will light up his ass for this act.

As for punishment, I say the cops throw his ass on the ice and have him drop the gloves with Marty McSorley. And no cowering.