You’ve been sitting around the house, eating greasy pizza, watching the NFL Network and avoiding your annoying girlfriend or wife. You haven’t moved off the couch in 48 hours and your phone died, rendering your Twitter account worthless.
Meanwhile, sports smack-talking maniacs have been using social media and other outlets to vent on fellow combatants. Athletes are fighting writers. Writers are fighting writers. Athletes are fighting fans.
This is where Busted Coverage steps in on a weekly basis. The gatekeepers.
If someone is in a sports-related war, we’re all ears. If you know of a sports-related beef, we want to hear about it. There are no sports beefs too small for The Schoolyard editors. Try us.
Jerry Stackhouse vs. Haters
Fight Combatants: Brooklyn Nets guard Jerry Stackhouse vs. Fans
Fight Details: Stack is 38, doesn’t start for the Nets and is about to fade away into retirement, yet he’s been beefing this week with Nets fans. Stack doesn’t even play that much, yet fans are riding him because he’ll actually respond to their absurdity.
@jkrugelhead get your followers up.. You’re not even worthy of a response
@BSchulzBKN Fans want interaction but when it’s not what you want to hear.. It’s rude and defensive.. Ok
@BSchulzBKN I will… Shots come and go just like some “Fans”. I’ve shot 0-1 in 4 of the last 5 game. I’m really struggling? Gtfoh
And then there was the direct message to this @BSchulzBKN character.
Fight Scorecard: Stackhouse – via decision; If you’re fighting with Stack on Twitter, that’s the definition of a loser.
Bradley Wiggins vs. Lance Armstrong
Fight Combatants: British Cyclist Bradley Wiggins vs. Lance Armstrong
Fight Details: Yep, there are still people in society that are lashing out at poor Lance. Wiggins feels that Armstrong was cheating during the 2009 Tour de France, which kept the British cyclist off the podium. Armstrong claims he didn’t dope after 2005.
“What upset me the most was [Armstrong talking] about 2009-10 – I thought you lying bastard,” said Wiggins.
Fight Scorecard: Lance Armstrong was KO’d many weeks ago. Feel free to kick him as much as you’d like.
Anna Burns Welker vs. Ray Lewis
Fight Combatants: Anna Burns Welker (Wes’ wife) vs. Ray Lewis
Fight Details: Anna, famous for her work as a Miss Hooters International and for marrying Wes Welker, went on a short Facebook rant about Ray Lewis after the Patriots lost the AFC championship and her husband, yet again, couldn’t catch a ball.
Yep, she hit all the talking points on Ray’s resume. How classy for her to bring kids and baby mammas into the war.
Of course she eventually retracted her anger in a statement to Larry Brown Sports, saying “I let the competitiveness of the game and the comments people were making about a team I dearly love get the best of me.”
Fight Scorecard: Ray Lewis is playing his final game in the Super Bowl. 1st round KO.
Jennifer Capriati Vs. Serena Williams’ Supporters
Fight Combatants: Former tennis great Jennifer Capriati and Twitter users
Fight Details: Capriati, infamous for her drug and alcohol issues more than her tennis game, made the mistake early Wednesday morning to sorta attack Serena Williams during her Australian Open match against rising star Sloane Stephens.
Challenge.. Maybe tennis will become interesting again. I’ve seen enough Serena to last a life time..lol
Serena fans attacked Capriati for her drug use and called her a “b–ch.” The vitriol only ended when Caps finally deleted her account, but not before showing how naive she is on Twitter.
U wouldn’t be allowed to talk to someone like this in person u would be arrested so why is it acceptable in this forum?
Fight Scorecard: Serena fans via TKO. Caps got off the mat a couple of times with freedom of speech tweets, but in the end she lost and went away a broken woman.
Katie Couric vs. Manti Te’o
Fight Combatants: Manti Te’o vs. Katie Couric vs. John Q. Public
Fight Details: You know the story. Famous football player has fake girlfriend. Football player keeps lie going at the BCS so Notre Dame can keep the allure of the Dome alive. Football player acts shocked when Internet tells him he’s been chatting with a fake girlfriend. Football player goes on Katie to say he’s not a liar and that you should believe him.
Meanwhile, Katie fires back with an “Are you gay?” line of questioning. Manti counters with “FAAARR from it.”
Fight Scorecard: John Q. Public is the winner via the scorecards. It’s impossible for Te’o to win this fight because John Q. Public has a hard time believing this guy can be this stupid.