Manny Ramirez Finds God, Graduates From Miami Mega-Church School

USA Today reporter Jorge L. Ortiz has a story out this week on Manny Ramirez, how he’s handling retirement and what the future holds for a guy who failed a PED test in 2011. Instead of telling Ortiz about pounding booze at Club LIV, Ramirez used ‘God’ in a sentence. In fact, we’ve figured out that

Manny is going to church and even graduated from schooling at the infamous Segadores de Vida church in Hollywood, Fla. 

Yep, Ramirez goes to a mega-church.

Segadores De Vida (Harvesters of Life) is a non-denominational Christian Church located in South Florida. The weekly attendance averages 7,000, including men, women, youth and children.

It’s unclear what it takes to graduate from Segadores church schooling and Ortiz never got to the bottom of that story. He spent more time asking Ramirez about the PEDs and the end of his baseball career.

“I thank the Lord because of what happened to me, because it led me to getting to know Him,” Ramirez said. “Maybe if those things had not happened, I would have continued hitting home runs and my soul would have been lost. I already had my glory on the street, so now I have to seek my glory in the kingdom of God.”

Manny logic: PEDs led me to getting kicked out of baseball, which led me to eventually (allegedly) slapping my wife, which led me to trying to get back into baseball, which led to a horrible stint in Triple-A, which led me to finding God.

Makes sense.

Manny made $206,827,769 during his baseball career. Guess that means Segadores will be getting an indoor batting cage.

(That’s Manny’s wife in the red cap and gown.)

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