Wait, So Is This Dude LeBron’s Father Or Not? Lawsuit Dismissed! [Legal News]

Leicester Bryce Stovell hit a roadblock in the journey to rewrite history and to cash in on the fame of one LeBron James. See, Stovell claims he impregnated Gloria James back in 1984 and daddy wants money from Gloria for concealing who the baby daddy was. And he wants millions. But it was announced today that U.S. District Judge Colleen Kollar-Kotelly has dismissed Leicester’s bizarre lawsuit seeking $4mm in damages. So it begs the question, “If L Dog isn’t the father of King James, then who is?” Glen Rice?

Via The Blog of Legal Times (they’re trustworthy, we’ve checked):

Stovell, a former lawyer for the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, hoped to get a new paternity test and asked for millions in damages. He said James and his mother, Gloria James, defamed his character and committed fraud in concealing the identity of the father.

In an opinion filed late today, U.S. District Judge Colleen Kollar-Kotelly granted a request by James and his mother to dismiss the case. The judge wrote that, among other problems, Stovell’s lawsuit failed to show that he had incurred any actual damages, such as lost commercial opportunities.

“Apparently, Stovell believes that companies are willing to pay him for being the father of LeBron James. However, any such recovery would be wholly speculative,” Kollar-Kotelly wrote in the 21-page opinion.

Guys, we’re not talking about a complete moron, this Stovell guy. He went to Princeton and has that former U.S. lawyer status. True, it was with the S.E.C. Interestingly enough, we were cruising his Facebook page and LeBron James isn’t listed under his Favorite Athletes tab. That’s sad.

So we imagine a world where the greatest player in NBA history is named LeBron Stovell. Does it ring? Would you wear a Stovell #23 jersey? Maybe Gloria James was just a forward thinker and realized that her son would need a simple last name that would resonate with the Anglo community.

At least, if Stovell really is LeBron’s daddy, he’s not a complete moron. Just a moron lawyer looking to cash in his retirement check. Can’t say we blame him.

[Judge Rules for LeBron James, Tosses Paternity Suit]

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