Cuff ‘Em: Altoona Curve Game Interrupted By Drunken Bum On Field Trying To Find Concession Stand


From today’s Altoona (Pa.) Mirror:

A homeless man who was drunk, according to police, claimed he was looking for the fastest way to the concession stand at Blair County Ballpark, so he jumped over the center-field fence and walked slowly across the outfield during Tuesday night’s Altoona Curve game.

The bizarre sequence – the first of its kind in 12 seasons at BCB – occurred in the bottom of the ninth inning as Altoona played Akron and resulted in the man’s arrest.

Tyrone R. Squires, 24, was described by police as being homeless and originally from Massachusetts but with no permanent address. Sporting a thick, dark beard and wearing an old-time military hat, Squires kept his hands in his pockets as he strolled at a very slow pace from left to right along the outfield wall on the warning track.

And more greatness.

“He was very deliberate as he was walking,” Curve owner Bob Lozinak said. “He wasn’t in any big hurry to get anywhere.”

But this is where things get fun. So how exactly would the Akron outfielder, whom Squires walked behind, handle the situation?

Light his ass up, says the Cleveland prospect!

Aeros outfielder John Drennen has a solution.

Drennen said he never feared for his safety.

“You never know,” Drennen said. “There are some crazy people out there, but everyone was keeping an eye on him. Everything was all right.”

Drennen said his first thought was, “Get off the field, idiot.”

“There’s no room for that,” the Akron player added. “He should have gotten Tasered.”

Come again? Everything was alright but drunken bum dude should have been tased?

Dude, you are in the minors where between innings there are people in fat sumo suits running ar0und like idiots. Couldn’t one of them get bat-shit crazy and do something abnormal?

Tyrone was just looking for some cold Rolling Rock and he had a spare dollar in his pocket.

Can’t we all just chill out on the Taser idea? If your security guards can’t chase down a man walking through the outfield then something is amiss.

By the way, if you know Tyrone, have a photo of Tyrone or know how to get in touch with him via drop box, email us.

[Man on field at Curve game arrested]

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