Cuff ‘Em: Punk Pulls Heat On Bikini Espresso Ladies, 6-Year-Old Takes Parents Wheels To School, Mark Ingram: The Fall Of…And Britain Wheelchair Great Faces Deportation

Robbing a bikini espresso stand not cool at all, idiot. 

“Cuff ‘Em” is a daily look at who’s in trouble with the law. It’s our hope to limit this to 5 sports-related morons, but it can be modified at our discretion or if there is a sudden outbreak of superior stupidity.

  • This Virginia 6-year-old has a real shot at becoming a NASCAR driver after his recent driving prowess was put on display. “Police say the boy drove a Ford Taurus about six miles Monday after missing the school bus. They say he weaved in and out of traffic and crossed a river bridge before crashing into a utility pole.” His parents were arrested for being morons and leaving the keys where the little Dale Jr. could get to them.
  • Not sports related but when a punk decides to pull a gun on the ladies at Seattle’s bikini espresso drive-thru, we take notice. Police say the suspect has a shaved head, hazel eyes and many tattoos, including the words “Anti-Christ” on his neck, a burning cross on his throat, a teardrop below his left eye and the words “game” and “over” on his eyelids. His scalp is covered by a demon-like tattoo with fangs at his hairline.”