Daily Dump: Remembering The Vick, How To Get Arrested, Sauerbrun Crazy, Dave Chappelle in London, Tebow Wears Jorts

Today we shall discuss how to be a moronic athlete.

Step 1: Get rich, decide dog fighting would be a great off-season diversion.

Step 2: Kill said dogs after they are worthless to you.

Step 3: Get arrested for said crime, plead innocence to FBI, fail lie detector, get ass shipped to jail for 2 years.

Step 4: Your football friends come to your defense on national TV wearing “Free Mike Vick” tshirts.

We’re dealing with completely f&*ing stupid individuals here. The Atlanta Falcons are a classless organization, always have been and proved it again. Roddy White should be looking for a new team this morning. His ass would have needed a moving van after I threw all his shit into the parking lot after last night’s loss.

That’s the problem with the NFL right now. There are so many worthless thugs playing in the league it’s mostly unwatchable. Run a 4.3 but can’t spell “forty?” 

Even punters are becoming a huge pain in the ass.  

We’ll take college football over these idiots any day of the week.

Sidenote: I had a dream nightmare last night where Tony Kornheiser was the color guy for a baseball game in Toronto. I hate to think what it means when Kornholer is showing up in my REM dreams. Maybe I need to look at more of these so I can dream of the beach and bikinis.

Hopefully Marisa Miller (see below) takes Kornholer’s spot tonight.

Today’s Dump: 

High school football coach thinks porn clip funny, female student disagrees, promptly arrested [Citizen Times]

Dave Chappelle continues career in London basement [MacGsWorld]

Tebow accessorizes Heisman with jorts, cheap chains [Losers With Socks]

Collinsworth’s vagina petitions government to return “H” to name [Mister Irrelevant]

Prepare for more Zeppelin than you can stand from ESPN, MNF [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

Today’s Tail: 

Destiny White shows the goods, very good goods [Slamdizzle]

Florida State’s Delta Gammas stomp on FSU logo [Hottest Girls of Sororities]

Jersey girl studies at Rowan, parties in pants [Hottest Girls on Facebook]

Kardashian beach party perfect time to show off cleavage [Drunken Stepfather]

Marisa Miller yet another example of Photoshop’s unique abilities [Tasty Booze]

Want a FREE Tempe12 Girls of the Big Ten Calendar? Submit a link. If we use it, you win!

Today’s Winner: It wasn’t you.

Send us the links: mail AT bustedcoverage DOT com