This will go down as the greatest Cuff 'em television news reports we've ever seen. Ever. No contest. Last night in Fresno, California the local ABC affiliate led its newscast with news of Lorenzo Neal's July 4th DUI bust. The population of Fresno, according to Wikipedia, is 500,000+. Yes, we'd assume there would be bigger fish to fry. But...ABC went balls to the walls and created this piece of journalism history. It's 2:25 of chewy goodness & a Pirates cap! JUMP!