Bob Lorenz has been around the world of sports for what seems like 25 years or so, bouncing between CNNSI, TNT & TBS. Now he's at the YES Network living the good life. Things must be great because he's on the hook for a DUI relating to an early Wednesday morning incident with Connecticut police. How (allegedly) hammered was our boy, Lorenz? Passed the f*ck out at a stop light. Gone. Hammered. Nappy time. JUMP!
Via: Two men from out of state were arrested late Super Bowl Sunday after they yelled at a woman and chased her around her car because she was wearing a New York Yankees coat and hat, according to a city police report. Lynn Jordan, 25, of Texas, and Andrew Bonner, 23, of Vermont, were arrested on breach of peace charges. Bigger crime here: dropping f-bombs on this woman or this woman wearing a Yankees hat & coat on Super Bowl Sunday? Make the call.
Via: According to the report, at around 1 a.m. Sunday, a bartender at the Pearl Street Pub and Cellar at 1108 Pearl St. said Pericak lit the contents of a metal bucket on fire. Bartenders said the bucket contained trash and miscellaneous papers and were able to put it out with no damage to the bar. Pericak later told police, "Listen, I had some beers and caused some trouble, but I haven't done anything illegal... I left the bar." Totally innocent. Dick cops causing problems. Drop it, boys.
Via: According to police spokesman Bruce Frazier, the man exposed himself to a female shopper at the Wal-Mart store on Shugart Road in the northwest Georgia town on Thursday. “The female shopper was in the area of the shoe department when the suspect got her attention and exposed himself to her,” Frazier said. If the Internet can figure out who the Bama Teabagger was, this one shouldn't take much effort. Spread the word. Have a tip in this case? firstname.lastname@example.org
Want to know how Patriots fan & Ravens fan settle their differences - in Virginia - at 2 a.m. the morning after Billy Cundiff shanked the game-tying field goal? Ravens fan throws Patriots fan through a window. F-ing Billy Mullins. Look at this guy. You think he takes sh*t off some punk ass Patriots fan? Hell no he doesn't. Dude is from Tennessee. Police say Billy and his homeboys exacted a little revenge and now he has a felony on his head. JUMP!
Via CBS 4 Denver: The robbery happened at a Bank of the West near Interstate 25 and County Line. The Arapahoe County sheriff says the man walked into the bank, passed a note to a teller and demanded money. The clerk handed over some cash and the man ran away. The suspect is said to be a white man, about 40 to 50 years old. Still waiting to hear from the FBI on what name is on that jacket. Could Rockies guy just be trying to throw off the fuzz? Is he that smart?
Via WMUR: Police said the robbery happened about 2:30 p.m. at Sovereign Bank on Lafayette Road. Authorities said the robber was a heavy-set, white man with brown hair. He was wearing a gray hooded sweatshirt or jacket and a New England Patriots hat with a pink stripe on the visor. Police said the hat also had a new Patriots logo on the front and possibly a breast cancer support ribbon on the back. No biggie, just making an AFC Championship withdrawal.
Via NorthFulton.com: According to Police Spokeswoman Lisa Holland, the suspect walked into the Suntrust Bank on 2300 Holcomb Bridge Road inside the Kroger grocery store and handed over a notes demanding money. The man is described as in his mid 40s, 5'10", 280 pounds. He was wearing a blue jacket and jeans. Also he had a Mitchell and Ness snapback Buffalo Sabres hockey team baseball cap. Let's get his ass: email@example.com
Excuse us for not knowing the New Mexico State University men's basketball team has a super fan named James K. Killgore. That's what the Las Cruces newspaper is telling us this morning. It seems Kilgore got a little too superfan-y Thursday night during NMSU's game against Utah State. But this is a first. It seems Kilgore got into it with a ref. One thing led to another and, well, a blowjob gesture was made. JUMP!
Via the F.B.I. Knoxville bureau: Today, the Knoxville Division of the FBI launched an electronic billboard campaign seeking the public’s assistance to help identify a serial bank robber active in East Tennessee. The individual is suspected of robbing of at least three banks in Tennessee. He is possibly in his 30s and has been wearing a baseball cap during each of the robberies. We're thinking former college footballer, possibly o-lineman. Nail him: firstname.lastname@example.org
Via ABC7: The Sarasota County Sheriff’s Office is looking for a suspect who robbed a 7-11 in Sarasota. Just after 10:30 Monday night, a man entered the store in the 2700 block of Beneva Road with a white cloth covering his face. He implied to the clerk he had a weapon and demanded the money from the register. He is described as a white male, 30-40 years old, approximately 6 feet tall, 170 pounds. Do your thing Ohio State fan. Get his ass: email@example.com
Via the Oklahoman: About 1 p.m. (Sat.), a white male entered the bank inside a grocery store at 249 N Douglas Blvd. and gave the teller a note demanding $100, $50 and $20 bills, FBI spokesman Clay Simmonds said. The teller complied, and the robber left the store. The robber is in his 20s or early 30s and is about 5-feet-11, weighing 180 to 200 pounds. Of f*cking course he's got a poker addiction. Probably some student loans. Wears hats backwards. firstname.lastname@example.org
There are weeks that go by when checking the Maricopa (AZ) Sheriff Office website is a waste of time. And then there are those home runs that make up for all those worthless fishing expeditions. Today we landed a big fish - Michael Gregory Holguin. Thanks goes out to the sheriff office photographer who knew cropping out the Steelers logo would have left these photos 50% more worthless. True, the tats speak volumes, but in the blogging world that simple logo is gold. JUMP!
Via The Telegram: The Royal Newfoundland Constabulary is requesting the assistance of the general public in identifying a person responsible for an armed robbery at a commercial business on Topsail Road in St. John’s, Dec. 26. At the time of the offence, he was wearing a dark winter vest, light- coloured hoodie, dark pants and light-coloured baseball hat. Stupid Canadians. That's a Texas Longhorns hat. Just for that, we're not offering our search services. Suck it.
Via First Coast News (Jacksonville): State alcohol agents arrested a Jacksonville man who they said was selling moonshine from a barbecue stand on Beaver Street the morning of the Gator Bowl game. One agent purchased a shot of vodka and another purchased a shot of moonshine. Agent Dianne Stanley asked for Grey Goose vodka and was advised by the suspect it was moonshine, according to a Jacksonville Sheriff's Office. Yeah, but how was the BBQ? Any good?
Via the Post-Dispatch: A robber stole an undisclosed amount of money today from a Pulaski Bank at 900 Olive Street in the area's first bank robbery of 2012. Surveillance cameras captured the suspect, a black man who appeared to be in his late 30s or early 40s and between 5 feet 9 inches and 5 feet 11 inches tall. Not noted: dude will likely be walking the streets and be color coordinated. This is our year. Afraid to turn in your homeboy? We aren't: email@example.com