Verlander Took Pageviews Putt Putting Night Before Royals Destroyed Him

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Verlander-Upton-Putt-Putting

 

This Verlander-Pageviews relationship drama just keeps getting more interesting by the day. I’ve already presented my case as to why Kate Upton is killing JV’s career ($20,000,000 salary this season) and has turned him into one of the worst starting pitchers, statistically, in baseball.

JV, 31, is busy giving too much effort entertaining Upton, who is just six months older than Johnny Manziel.

JV was 4-1 in April and looking great when Upton was away promoting a movie. She comes back and the guy is 3-6 since. But this is more than the numbers. This guy is literally starring in his own season of the Bachelor while trying to win a World Series. The guy is the travel agent of the relationship. She wants to be pampered by the multi-millionaire. You think she’s coming up with relationship outing ideas? No chance.

So that brings us to the putt putt photo. June 15 was Sunday. The Tigers played at home, beat the Twins 4-3 and Verlander didn’t pitch. Great, time to play travel agent on another episode of The Bachelor! Putt putt night!

The next day Verlander was smoked by the Royals: 6 innings, 12 hits, 7 earned, 2 walks, 2 Ks.

Look, those of us in our 30s know what happens when we turn 30. The body just isn’t the same. We’re tired. The legs go first. We just don’t have the same stamina as in our early to mid-20s. You wake up in the morning after putt putting not knowing what hit you.

So what’s the solution here? I hate to say Verlander needs to dump Pageviews and find some 30-year-old chick who is more established in life because that’s boring for BC so we won’t go that far. There are options.

How Verlander can save his season:

• Stop thinking you’re on The Bachelor

• A nice dinner AT HOME and a DVR the night before a start; maybe board games

• No sex the night before a start

• Upton agrees to go on a two-week Bali vacation with her friends…you pay for all of it

• Verlander agrees to not bring Upton with him on the road the rest of the season

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