“Poonster” … “Shocker” & “Teabag” At HOF Induction & My NYC Cab Nightmare

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Poonster, Teabag & Shocker

Ever had to tell a cab driver how to get to LaGuardia Aiport? I had to on Saturday. In fact, I thought I was going to die on the Grand Central Parkway, the highway you take to get to LGA.

It all started yesterday in Midtown when I was simply trying to get from 35th & 8th to LGA. It’s the same trip I’ve made 12-15 times over the last couple years. But this time was very, very different. The cab driver asked what terminal we needed at LGA.

“We’re on Spirit,” I said.

That confused him because he was typing in LGA into his GPS. Those of you who visit NYC for work know what this means. I didn’t exactly know what was about to happen.

The cab driver hit an SUV at around 39th and 8th. Then at about 5th and 45th, he nearly turned left in front of a speeding car that would’ve led to a serious injury to Mrs. Busted, who was sitting on the right side of the car.

Eventually we made it to Queens, but via the Queensboro Bridge (again, those of you who go to the airport know what this means) and onto the Grand Central Parkway.

The bad news: the cab driver had never driven on a highway.

He froze.

He was going around 20-25 mph, nearly hitting other cars, nearly being hit by other cars, driving on the shoulder for miles, making his own lanes and didn’t understand what “take this exit” meant.

It was a complete nightmare, and one in which I thought I would need to drive the cab to the airport so we didn’t get hit by another car.

The nightmare ended at LGA with me telling this moron that I wasn’t paying him the $51 tab and screaming “open the trunk” so I could get our bag. Thankfully I didn’t have to choke him to get the suitcase.

If you ever end up in NYC cab 7K19 and the driver seems odd, please tell him to stop and run. Run away.

Yes, I talked to 911 at the airport and they said I’d have to file a complaint with LGA police. The NY Taxi Commission was an even bigger mess. They said for me to file a complaint I’d need to give testimony on an undetermined date.

Meanwhile, a cab driver who had never driven on a highway was headed back on the streets. Makes sense to me.

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