Vanderbilt head football coach James Franklin might be cracking under the stress of the SEC. If your college football team hadn’t won a conference championship since 1923 and had just six bowl appearances ever, you’d be stressed, too.
That has to be why Franklin is now considering offering scholarships to unborn children:
“If I see a 6-foot-6 man walking in the mall with his wife, and she’s 6-2 and she’s pregnant, I’ll go up and offer their unborn child,” Franklin said.
“I’m not exaggerating. I do that all the time. If I go to speak at an elementary school, if I’m out at a restaurant, we kind of have fun with it. It’s about developing a relationship with people. It’s about getting them connected with Vanderbilt…”
Franklin offered a scholarship to seventh-grader Jahlen Jack of Bellevue, Wash. in April, yet the coach has claimed in the past that he’d only make offers to players who were “already SEC-ready.” (No 7th grader is ready for SEC football unless he has a beard and drives to middle school. Hell, a lot of Jacksonville Jaguars players aren’t ready for the SEC.)
All this premature recruiting means Nick Saban may start getting his players’ legacy rights and capturing their swimmers to grow football players in the lab. Note that Vandy didn’t attempt that sort of thing with little Camden Cutler.