Bernie Williams Selling NY Home With Depressing Theater – $3.5 Million

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We’ve seen bad home theaters in athlete houses and then we laid eyes on what Bernie Williams has going on in his Armonk, NY mansion that he’s trying to sell for $3.5 million.

The projector looks like it cost more than my car, but then it’s all downhill. Let’s first talk about the size of this room: Too small. A sectional couch against a wall is terrible for theater sound. Let’s talk about wiring: Bernie made $103,100,001 during his MLB career and can’t hire a professional to wire the room? Seriously, dog?

According to his Realtor:

Thomas wright estates. Stately brick colonial with 6 bedrooms and 5.2 baths, set on private gated landscaped property. Exquisite in-ground gunite pool and spa. Extensive millwork,hardwood floors,gourmet eat-in-kitchen,3 fireplaces. Finished walkout lower level includes playroom/gym,summer kitchen,au pair,bath,media rm,recording studio.

Yes, you get his infamous recording studio, the same one that everyone gushes over because it’s Bernie Williams. You people don’t actually like his music.

Real Highlights Of Bernie’s Pad:

• 6 bed, 6 bath

• 3 acres to mow

• The pool: elegant, spacious and perfect for a 10 kegger

40 miles from Rick’s Cabaret in Midtown

12 miles from Whole Foods

Asking: $3,500,000

Mortgage: $19,000 to start; add-ons include landscapers and pool boy

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