It’s no secret that I hate college basketball until the games actually mean something. You give me tournament action and my ass is firmly planted on a couch watching hours of college teams shoot 35% from the field. That time is here.
Is it possible for a college team to score 89-95 points in a game? It’s impossible, right? You turn on the Big East tournament and some 7-foot white boy from Notre Dame is throwing up jump shots and skyhooks. Clanks every shot.
You turn on the Big Ten tournament and at least 4-5 white boys are launching threes and barely catching rim.
You want offense? Ok, let’s go to the ACC tournament where Duke is already out and Miami scrapes together 69 points against a horrible 16-17 Boston College. At least North Carolina and Maryland dropped 83.
You add it all up and Dan Shulman is a complete mess and begging for it to all end tonight with Syracuse against Louisville.
Meanwhile, people are even catching ESPN fails on ESPN internet feeds. Bottom right.
And they’re catching timezone errors.
Easily the coolest Coke grocery display you’ll see all weekend. Is that Mellow Yellow?
And we finish in NY with MORE F–KING BASKETBALL!