The Schoolyard: Dick Vitale Vs. Glass Door, Dockett & Ocho Beef, Couture Out At UFC & Cuts Proposes To Cavs

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You’ve been sitting around the house, eating greasy pizza, watching the NFL Network and avoiding your annoying girlfriend or wife. You haven’t moved off the couch in 48 hours and your phone died, rendering your Twitter account worthless.

Meanwhile, sports smack-talking maniacs have been using social media and other outlets to vent on fellow combatants. Athletes are fighting writers. Writers are fighting writers. Athletes are fighting fans.

This is where Busted Coverage steps in on a weekly basis. The gatekeepers.

If someone is in a sports-related war, we’re all ears. If you know of a sports-related beef, we want to hear about it. There are no sports beefs too small for The Schoolyard editors. Try us.

mail@bustedcoverage.com

Manti Te’o vs. His Stupid Beyoncé Super Bowl Tweet

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Fight Combatants: Manti Te’o goes to war with Twitter villains

Fight Details: You can see the tweet. Manti should know that he can’t use CAPS and drop a “KILLED THAT” in the same tweet without taking heat from his haters. One thing led to another and the heat became so much that Manti deleted his account, claiming he needed to focus on the NFL draft.

Fight Scorecard: Twitter villains in like an 8 round TKO. It took time for this moron to go away, but the public finally won the war.

Dick Vitale’s Nose vs. A Glass Door

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Fight Combatants: Dickie V’s nose and a University of Michigan glass door

Fight Details: See that cut on Dickie’s nose? That’s the result of the talking head running his nose into a glass door. Not kidding.

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Fight Scorecard: Dickie got knocked down early, but got up, called the UM-OSU game and has a sweet door wound. Dickie V. by decision.

Ocho vs. Darnell Dockett

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Fight Combatants: Old friends Chad Johnson and Arizona Cardinals DT Darnell Dockett

Fight Details: Ho-hum. These two are always beefing. What are they actually beefing about? Who the hell knows. It’s Twitter. One guy rips on the other for being fat. One guy rips on the other for wearing skinny jeans. They’re the Laurel & Hardy of black guys fighting on Twitter.

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Fight Scorecard: Draw. Both are 140 character professionals.

BONUS: Chris Rix questioned Darnell Dockett’s sexual orientation on the Jay Mohr Show (listen here).

That led to this >

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Dana White vs. The Natural

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Fight Combatants: UFC commissioner Dana White and the UFC hall of famer Randy Couture

Fight Details: Randy skipped town to join the Bellator camp. Dana accuses ‘The Natural’ of leaving before fulfilling his contract.

Among White’s comments were that Couture requested to appear on FOX as an analyst during UFC cards. After three broadcasts, he bailed with one event left on his contract to sign with Bellator and Spike. White also claimed Couture lied via text message about negotiating with the competition.

“I’m happy he’s gone forever and he’s with them,” White told a group of reporters following Saturday’s UFC 156 post-fight press conference. “Couture, I don’t respect him at all.

However, Randy’s fighter profile is still up on UFC.com.

Fight Scorecard: Dana via quote choke. It appears Randy can forget about ever coming back to the UFC.

Kristin Cavallari vs. Jay Cutler’s Haters

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Fight Combatants: Kristin Cavallari going after sports blogs & people picking on Cuts

Fight Details: Cavallari has an E! special coming out on March 10 so the reality bimbo needs to create headlines to ramp up ratings. So she tells E! that Jay proposed via text and mailed her an engagement ring. Not even 24 hours later, Cavs says she was misquoted.

Stop bashing jay. He proposed in Cabo. Stop believing headlines…u have no clue. They take 1 piece of an interview to get ppl talking.

Uh huh. You want us to stop picking on Cuts? Stop opening your stupid trap for E! specials. Deal?

Fight Scorecard: The public via 1st round KO.

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