Little did we know, until tonight, that Reds’ OF Jay Bruce will be getting married Saturday in Texas to girlfriend Hannah Eastham. The Big Piece, Ryan Howard, will also be getting married Saturday. We’ve already sent a gift to Howard so it’s only fair that BC goes shopping for Bruce.
The big problem with the Bruce-Eastham wedding registries is A) the gift prices are ridiculous, and B) we’re less than 48 hours to the wedding which means the cheap gifts have been snapped up. It’s always a BC rule to get a gift that the athlete will use, and the gift must be a ridiculous item to buy for a multi-millionaire athlete.
That means Bruce isn’t getting the $100 ironing board, $150 trash can or the $230 cutting board from Williams-Sonoma.
Instead, Bruce, who has made $8,649,166 in his MLB career, and will make $42 million guaranteed over the next four years, will be getting a $9 washcloth just like Ryan Howard. The happy couple will use the washcloth and it’s the cheapest item remaining on the Pottery Barn registry.