Want to know what Chinese steroids will do to your face? They’ll cause giant moles to grow beards. Look at this Zhang Jie character during today’s London Olympics 62kg weightlifting. That’s not an illusion. It’s a giant hairy mole that could use a trim. Why he’s not using clippers on that beast is a Chinese mystery. Maybe it’s his lucky hairy mole. We’re just as perplexed as the rest of London on this one.
In case it matters, Zhang – the favorite to win gold – finished 4th. We’re telling you, Jie, it’s time to buzz off the mole hair. Oh, well, enjoy going home to China and being beaten by the army.