What have we learned from Rob Gronkowski about life over the last 12 months? Fist pumping, grinding on blondes, wearing Zubaz, being Team Leader of the JB’s and having chicks cup your balls for Instagrams can all pay off. The Patriots tight end signed a six-year deal today worth $54 million. That’s a HUGE deal for a guy who “still wears jeans from high school,” according to his father. Just think of the beach house he can afford for Spring Break ’13. It’s on, beotches!
An AP reporter was able to get dad to go on record about how this will change the fist pumper:
”No, Rob is Rob. He still to this day will wear jeans that he had in high school, and shirts that he had in high school,” he said. ”We’re not flashy people. And that’s Rob all the way. The money, it’s nice, don’t get me wrong, but it will not change him. Rob will always be Rob the goofball.”
God, if you do exist, please don’t make Gronk go into hiding or become boring. Please let him have another huge year and keep getting invited to the Playboy Mansion. God, you have no idea how valuable this guy is to a website. Pure gold.
Fist pumping our ass off straight to the bank with Gronk. One big happy Team JB!