Another day, another reason to love either the Toronto Blue Jays or Texas Rangers fan base. Here we have an upper deck brawl at the Skydome where those under 19 should be banned. Just card idiots who’re purchasing tickets. 19 and up? Get on up there, son. Drink until you puke. Drink until you’re fighting a guy two rows behind you. Brawl in the aisles. Baseball pussies will say Toronto fans are the worst. We think just the opposite.
Let us break down how this is helpful for ticket sales in Toronto. (1.) Fight video gets uploaded to YouTube, (2.) Internet takes notice of fight video, (3.) Toronto bros think this is much more exciting than a Maple Leafs game, (4.) Hipsters are wearing cool jerseys, (5.) Cheap tickets & beer!, (6.) You have a new fan.
Posted: Last night
Premise of Video: This is from the Jays home opener against the Red Sox on Monday night. As you can see, there’s lots of shoving and a few old coots looking scared. Don’t worry, old coots, the kids are only worried about fighting fellow drunks.
Climax of Video: One solid punch. Wait for it! Wait!
Conclusion: How many times do we need to preach to drunk baseball fight guy to drag your opponent down to your row before kicking his ass? You morons need to realize there is a reach advantage to Row N guy. Grab his ass by the jersey and yank him down to Row M. Then, as you’re dragging him to Row M, welcome him with a knee to the face. C’mon, Toronto drunks, get your shit together.