There’s a good chance this week you’ll be hearing quite a bit about Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader Laura Vikmanis. Laura holds the NFL record for oldest cheerleader – 43. Of course her story dominated the cheerleading circuit in 2011 when it became a sensation. The offers soon followed Guess what comes out this week? Yep, the book. And there are boob references.
Laura will be on the ‘Today’ show on Tuesday to promote “It’s Not About the Pom-Poms: How a 40-Year-Old Mom Became the NFL’s Oldest Cheerleader – and Found Hope, Joy, and Inspiration Along the Way.” The book just happens to go on sale tomorrow.
Thankfully, the editors at the Cincinnati Enquirer got their hands on an excerpt that points out what’s really going on in the world of NFL cheerleading.
- If you are more than 3 pounds above your goal weight, you’ll be benched for the next game.
- The only acceptable absence from practice is for your wedding, when you can miss a week’s worth of practice without penalty.
- Ben-Gals are paid $75 per game.
- Even though Ben-Gal uniforms show the midriff, T-shirts that show the belly are strictly prohibited away from the stadium – as are body piercings and glitter.
- Fraternization between Ben-Gals and Bengals is strictly prohibited.
- Ben-Gals call their husbands and boyfriends “Ben-Guys.”
- Until recently, Ben-Gals were required to wear Revlon lipstick in a much-hated shade called Orange Flip. Now it’s a warm red called Cherry Pop.
- Not all of the Ben-Gals get along. “The most prominent division on the Ben-Gals is not between the young girls and the older girls but between the Real Boobs and the Fake Boobs,” Vikmanis writes. “This is despite the fact that at any given time, a third of the Real Boobs are considering implants.”
The only bad news for Laura’s book promo on ‘Today’ is that she gets the third hour with Kathy Lee and Hoda, a time when most sane humans have switched the channel to QVC or House Hunters International. Anyway, we’ll be watching to hear more about this real vs. fake battle that is going on inside the Ben-Gals lockerroom. Should be riveting TV.
Expect the movie 2-3 years.