Joseph Cordes Points Laser Into Eyes Of Girls’ Hockey Goalie [Cuff 'Em]

By         Posted in   Cuff 'Em, Hockey

You know how we know this parent Joseph Cordes takes his daughter’s hockey games too seriously? How far would you go to help your daughter’s team get an advantage during a high school hockey game? Would you stand in the corner of an arena and shoot a laser pointer into the eyes of the opposing goalie? Are you that crazy? Well, Cordes is. And now the cops want to have a word with Super Dad. 

And how would you feel if your team won a game, 3-1, after you pointed a laser into the eyes of the opposing goalie? So many damn questions, right?

Via CBS Boston:

“I wish I could undo it,” Cordes tells WBZ-TV. “I feel like a complete jerk. It was very stupid, completely immature for a 42-year-old man to be doing that.”

Winthrop went on to win the game 3-1.

Cordes was barred from all events involving Winthrop High School.

“My daughter, the humiliation I put her through is sickening to tell you the truth,” says Cordes.

Medway-Ashland goalie Kathryn Hamer told WBZ-TV that the laser affected her play.

“It’s kind of like when you look at the sun and then you look away you see that spot and you can’t see for a couple of seconds. You shake your head and try to get it out of the system and just keep focusing, but it’s difficult,” she said.

First question for Cordes: Were you drinking? If so, this is perfectly legit behavior. Tell the cops you’ve been hitting the bottle a little too much lately and that you’ll seek help. These suburbanites will feel sorry and eventually open their arms after you complete some stupid rehab program.

Second questions for Cordes: Premeditated? Were you driving your daughter to the rink knowing the whole time you were about to laser point the opposing goalie? If so, something tells us you’re a Gregg Williams fan. Did Joseph Cordes have a bounty program for the Winthrop team. Better have an investigator digging deep into this story. Goodell, you free?

[CBS Boston]