Kim Kardashian Trying To Get In Tim Tebow’s Pants
It looks like Kim Kardashian is trying to trade up from the C-list to the A-list.
Clearly, she needs to spice things up on the TV show, so she’s turned to Denver Broncos Tim Tebow. He’s definitely an upgrade over New Jersey Nets forward Kris Humphries. Unfortunately, Tebow isn’t having any of it.
“Kim has a big crush on Tim,” a friend confided. “She says he’s not only very handsome but seems like a guy with really strong values.”
But it’s more than just infatuation for Kim, 31. Even though she has her own money, pals claim she’s also seeing dollar signs in the 24-year-old hunk! The once red-hot reality star’s popularity has tanked recently, particularly after her sudden separation from pro basketball player Kris Humphries after just 72 days of marriage.
Ah yes! Dollar signs!
Hell, we’re seeing dollar signs too. All of us at BC are now trying to get a date with Tim Tebow and we’re pretty sure one of us will be successful. Dating Tebow can only be good for traffic, right? And hey, Tim, most of us are virgins too!
The ratings for Kardashian’s show have reportedly fallen 14 percent since her divorce from Humphries. She’s also losing endorsement deals it appears. What the hell a no-talent broad not named The Situation gets to endorse is beyond us, but hey…
Anyway, like we said. Jesus Boy is saving his virginity for that special lady and we’re pretty sure her name ain’t Whore… I mean, Kardashian.
“Tim’s been made aware of Kim’s crush, and although flattered, he’s not interested,” said a source.
“He’s an avowed virgin who’s saving himself for marriage and is looking for a woman with similar values, not someone with two failed marriages AND a sex tape in her past!”
Oh, that’s right. Worst. Sex. Tape. Ever!
Well, at least they have something in common. She’s a shitty porn star. He’s a shitty quarterback. They’ve both failed at the thing everyone thought they’d be best at.