Juan Pablo Montoya’s Tire Man Look Like Pot Dealer To You?
And we here we thought meth, also affectionately known in civilized parts of the country as hillbilly heroin, was the only drug they did in The Dirty South.
Well, they proved us wrong again.
Trevor L. Lysne, the front tire changer for Juan Pablo Montoya’s No. 42 Earnhardt Ganassi Racing Sprint Cup car, was arrested Wednesday in Huntersville, N.C. on marijuana charges. We’re not talking about a dude with a half-smoked joint in his car ashtray, either.
Lysne, 40, is charged with trafficking marijuana, possession with intent to sell marijuana and maintaining a dwelling to distribute marijuana. That’s some heavy duty stuff.
Joining Lysne in handcuffs was 27-year-old Jerome D. Frey, a mechanic for Earnhardt Ganassi Racing. Frey was charged with trafficking and possession with intent to sell.
Police reportedly intercepted 10-12 pounds of marijuana being shipped from California.
For those of you not hip with the drug lingo, Lysne and Frey were caught with a large quantity of weed, which police believe they were planning to break down and sell to others. Since marijuana is at the root of all of society’s social problems, Lysne and Frey will probably be punished severely.
And rightfully so!
People are probably running around North Carolina right now, high as hell, killing others while they sleep! Either that, or they’re sitting in front of their televisions, eating Cheetos and discussing the profound wonders of the universe.
One of the two, we’re sure.
Anyway, this brings us to two conclusions.
First, if you live in The Dirty South, stick to cooking meth. All the ingredients are available at your local grocery and hardware stores.
Second, Montoya must really pay his crewmen for shit. So let this be a lesson to you, Juan Pablo.