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NBA Finals Douches, Ohio State Shrapnel & #NBARoleModels [Burnt Toast]

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Burnt Toast – June 1st

The Greatest Tweets in the History of the Internet* (* In the last 24 Hours)

NBA Finals: Douches from Miami vs Douches from Dallas

@MananaTex: NBA Finals: Greed 1, Evil 0

Unless you were in Miami or Dallas last night, watching that game was like watching 2 of the Jersey Shore kids fighting. You hope the both would get their ass kicked

@RussBengtson: So LeBron’s about to win his first Finals game. I assume the parade is tomorrow?

Tune in tonight, when ESPN airs it’s newest 30 for 30. Heat Wave: The Story of the Game 1 Finals Victory

@RonArtest: I’m watching Khloe and Lamar

Would have been so much better if he said that he was watching Kim and Ray J

@TheBillWalton: As a distinguished recipient of spliced Mogwai stem cells, JJ Barea is attacking the Heat as if someone fed him after midnight!

You know JJ Barea has a hairy ass. He has to, right????

Ohio State Shrapnel

@Mark_May: Looking into the Mayday Crystal ball the Buckeye head football coach in 2013 will be Nick Saben

Nick Saben? Very savvy play Mark May. If you get it right, you can brag; (Damn right I just used a SEMI-COLON!!!!) If not, you claim you meant you were talking about someone else since you misspelled the tweet. And why wouldn’t Saban want to roll to the Big 10? He can recruit anywhere, Big Ten with SEC caliber recruits….Cash Money Hoes.

@Pat_Dooley: The Decision? Bigger impact was Terrelle Pryor’s. He killed two coaches when he chose Ohio State over Michigan.

Factually true. Lloyd Carr would probably still be in Maise & Blue had Pryor chosen to take his talents to Ann Arbor. But let’s not get crazy, Terrelle Pryor hasn’t “killed” anyone……yet.

@DarrenRovell: In 2009-10, the women’s teams at Ohio State LOST $15.4 million, while the football team made $32 million.

Just wait until Si.com does the expose on the Buckeye Women’s Soccer team all getting free Subaru’s stocked with Orange slices and Capri Suns.

DUMBASS #HASHTAG OF THE NIGHT

#NBARoleModels

Last night during the Mavs-Heat Finals, the NBA had the Elephant Balls to run a promo with Lebron James talking about being a role model for kids, because not going to college, having a few out of wedlock kids, and stabbing a city in their back on national TV is role model material. So we started thinking, what other NBA Role Models are out there?

#NBARoleModels: Laterell Spreewell talking about the Dangers of Choking

#NBARoleModels: Kobe Bryant talking about Room Service Etiquette

#NBARoleModels: Shawn Kemp talking about Planned Parenthood

#NBARoleModels: Jason Kidd talking about Domestic Violence

#NBARoleModels: Jayson Williams talking about Gun Safety

#NBARoleModels: Antoine Walker talking about Fiscal Responsibility.

Random Holy S*** Tweet of the Day:

@ToureX: Keanu Reeves got 15% of the back end from the final 2 Matrix films. He made about $165 million.

Well played Bill. Or was he Ted? Either way, clearly Master P was not his agent for that deal. UHHHHHHHH!

Follow My Ass: @PeterBurnsRadio

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