Pick Six: Stare At Aubriee’s Abs And Bet On Christmas Eve, Take Chargers & Ohio U.
You have no idea how many â€œCheck Out My Gambling Picksâ€ emails get through our email spam filter. Some retard in Muncie, Indiana thinks heâ€™s the next Jimmy â€œThe Greekâ€ and blasts us with â€˜canâ€™t misses.â€™
While we appreciate the enthusiasm of these gambling gurus, the links never include poon. Enter Busted Coverage Special Assignment Editor Art McGregorâ€™s series â€“ Pick Six.
Ah ha! Bet you thought I’d be bringing you some pictures with a girl in a Santa hat, right? Nope! We’ve got fitness model Aubriee from Dallas.
I could have shown you some pictures of this pasty looking Santa-outfit wearing white chick with real big natural boobs (gross!) whose fat, red-headed dad probably roots for Notre Dame but I went with Aubriee’s contribution to society instead.
The goal of showcasing Aubriee’s ridiculous body is to make all seven female readers of Busted Coverage put down that second cookie they’re likely to grab on Christmas Eve and instead have them make a bee-line to the carrott table to enjoy some fruits and vegetables without the aid of dip because that shit can be fattening. (I said “fruits and vegetables” because I don’t know if a carrott is a fruit or a vegetable.)
Ho. Ho. Ho. Merry Christmas ladies!
These six picks really are a gift to you. Well, they’re actually kind of stocking stuffers. The pictures of Aubriee are more like the real presents under the tree and yes I’ve asked Santa for Aubriee under my tree. And double yes, my Christmas tree is fake and about 30 inches tall and I don’t have a chimney so this is going to be difficult. Speaking of hard things, on second thought, Aubriee’s gallery is more likely to help you stuff a stocking but I’ll let go of that joke right now as Santa is watching not that he could ever get into my house. He could just break down the door I guess because I do live in a pretty sketchy neighborhood but whatever.
LAST WEEK: 2-4 OVERALL: 43-58-1
Nevada -14.5 over Southern Methodist in The Hawaii Bowl (Thurs., 8 p.m., ESPN)
Cannot wait for this game because I’ve made the pact not to drink on Christmas Eve this year and by the time this game comes on, I’ll be like practically there!
San Diego +3 over TENNESSEE (Fri., 7:30 p.m., NFL Network)
The NFL’s obviously dropped the ball with ridding its schedule of Saturday afternoon games in December, but the scheduling of this game on one of the more boring evenings of the year makes up for it a lil’ bit. Good job, NFL. Yeah. I know. Christmas night is ridiculously boring.
Ohio -2.5 over Marshall in The Little Caesars Bowl (Sat., 1 p.m., ESPN)
Right down to the school colors and location on a regulation-sized globe, there are absolutely no differences between these two schools in Appalachia.
MIAMI -3 over Houston (Sun., 1 p.m., CBS)
Game (with the most depressing weather to those of us in the midwest) of the week.
PITTSBURGH -2.5 over Baltimore (Sun., 1 p.m., CBS)
LOCK OF THE SEASON. Left for dead less than a week ago, the Steelers are making the playoffs.
Kentucky +7.5 over Clemson in The Music City Bowl (Sun., 8:20 p.m., ESPN)
Clemson favored by more than a touchdown against a decent SEC team at a neutral site?