Cuff 'Em: Naked Bicyclist Says Facts Will Come Out In Court!

bike-ride-naked-smallThis is a new one for us.

You’ve heard of people hiking hundreds of miles in preparation to tackle the Appalachian Trail. Or baseball players taking extra BP to get ready for a stud left-hander.

But a guy riding a bike naked in anticipation of an upcoming nude race thousands of miles away?


Minneapolis police arrested Johann Scott Scrimshire on charges of lewd behavior and indecent exposure.

But he had an excuse.

The officers who responded said Scrimshire told them he was training for a bike race on the West Coast in which participants ride nude, said Sgt. William Palmer, a Minneapolis police spokesman.

Yeah, take that you pigs.

Men need to know where the chaffing will occur when taking to the seat with the beans and franks flowing freely.

We don’t blame Scrimshire in this case. A criminal defense lawyer by day, Johann says “the charges are ridiculous, and the facts will come out in court.”

Oh, dear God, that pun is probably the best we’ll read all day. Hilarious.


[The arrest document]

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