There are few things more awesome than March Madness. One of those happens to be Las Vegas. Another happens to be Penthouse Pets. And, of course, bacon is also included on that short list.
So, yada-yada-yada, slap all four together and you’ve got an orgy, so to speak, of college basketball and gambling goodness. Oh, and bacon. But, sadly, you have to win twoÂ bracket contests to swath your soon-to-be Penthouse ladyfriend in bacon.
But, if you’re capable enough, that bacon orgy can be all yours. That’s because BracketologyXD (appears SFW from first glance) is offering a package bracket prize that includes 1) a meet and greet with Penthouse Pet Heather Vandeven, 2) airfare for two to Las Vegas, 3) accommodations for two in Las Vegas and 4) spending money. I suggest you enter.
“But where’s the g*dd*mn bacon?!?!” you ask. Fair question. It’s somewhere else (oddly enough, on ESPN, in the form of a bracket group, via Intentional Foul)Â . And it’s in the form of a Bacon Explosion, a bacon-y treat so dangerous it made my heart palpitate 14 times just reading about it.
The moral of the story, of course, is this: if you have anything remotely resembling college basketball knowledge and you think you have the balls to beg politely ask for a Penthouse Pet to “bite onto my bacon log” then you need to enter both of these contests and, for the good of all humanity, take your Bacon Explosion out to Las Vegas for the good of blogging humanity.
Also, for the good of all humanity, the BracketologyXD people should probably go ahead and contact me to setup me live blogging the whole meet and greet event just to beef up their publicity.