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Cuff ‘Em: A No Contest Plea In Car Wash Vacuum Sex, NBA D-Leaguer Damone Brown Indicted, Coke Dealer Football Coaches And Mark Ingram In Court

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“Cuff ‘Em” is a daily look at who’s in trouble with the law. It’s our hope to limit this to 5 sports-related morons, but it can be modified at our discretion or if there is a sudden outbreak of superior stupidity.

  • We hope he was using some lubricant. A Saginaw, Michigan man entered a no contest plea for getting a hummer from a car wash vacuum. Yeah, not sports related, but sometimes we have to make exceptions. 6:45 a.m. Oct. 16 at 7362 Gratiot. A Thomas Township police officer parked nearby, approached on foot and caught the man in the act, investigators said. Is getting blown by a vacuum at that time of the morning considered desperation? Full Story.
  • It seems Damone Brown’s dreams of making it out of the NBA D-League will be over after being indicted in NY courts for renting a safe deposit box to keep drug profits. Not good, dog. Full Story.

  • Herbstreit, is that you? Dude, don’t wear your Centerville Football hooded sweatshirt when you go to rob a bank. Full Story.
  • In a down economy some youth football leagues will allow almost anyone to apply for a coaching position. Even coke dealers c0uld be teaching you son Xs and Os. Full Story.
  • Mark Ingram says he’s not guilty of jumping bail. He was just taking a timeout to watch son play in Sugar Bowl. Full Story.
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