* This is for entertainment purposes only. After seeing Sheriff deputies with rifles and tanks on the FLDS grounds we thought twice about this post. Oh well.
Polygamy is suddenly the hottest thing since Brittany being rushed to the hospital. It’s hotter than Barry Obama’s racist minister. Ratings are through the roof and Anderson Cooper is going toe-to-toe with 21-year-old chicks that appear to be in the Linda Cohn age range.
All this hoopla got us thinking. The male species has dirty thoughts about Maria Sharapova’s tennis game, Natalie Gulbis stroking a club and Danica Patrick driving the family minivan. This is your lucky day, fellas.
We’ve put together a little game called “Fantasy Sports Polygamy – Who You Marrying? Pick 5!”
The rules are simple: Build your five wives from the following five categories, picking only one wife per category. Simple, eh? Tell us your dream polygamy team in the comments section.
Maria Sharapova, Maria Kirilenko, Serena Williams, Ana Ivanovic.
Danica Patrick, Ashley Force
Natalie Gulbis, Paula Creamer, Laura Davies (to cook), Michelle Wie
Misty May, Logan Tom, Francesca Piccinini
Jamie Sale, Gretchen Bleiler, Haley Cope, Amy Taylor
(Thanks to Pop Crunch for research data. Visit them for a great look at all these beauties, except Laura Davies.)
Busted Coverage’s Fantasy Sports Polygamy Pick 5 (w/reasoning)
Maria Kirilenko, Tennis: Sharapova was the safe selection, but we’re going with the chick who might have a little more trouble with English. Communication in a polygamist sect is not really a big deal. Cooking and cleaning are better qualities.
Ashley Force, Racing: She won’t be scared of rush hour traffic while driving the huge 12-passenger family van.
Laura Davies, Golf: Just think of the great selections she could whip up for Sunday Night Football.
Misty May, Volleyball: We need a firecracker on this team.
Amy Taylor, Misc: Because we can, this is a fantasy after all.